What's That Smell?
by MistyxKisame
Summary: Peach is infected with some sort of strange virus that causes her to fart up a storm (sometimes literally) and just about nearly kills her friends and loved ones.
1. Blast from the Ass

Based off of my story What's That Smell that I wrote back when I first started out.

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"Man, I'm bored!" whined Daisy as she was chilling with Princess Peach and Toadette. "This girls' only thing is stupid!"

"I'm having loads of fun!" chirped the pink mushroom grinning from ear to ear. Well she would have literally if she had any ears. "Don't you like the way I did your hair?"

"Yeah. Great." said Daisy voice full of sarcasm. Toadette had turned her hair into the tangled equivalent of rat's nest with ribbons tied on it. After tonight, she wouldn't come near her head ever again.

"I'm sorry you aren't having a good time, Daisy." said Peach as she painted Toadette's fingernails. "Maybe we could..."

Peach felt her tummy grumbling and before she could react to the sound, she farted. She could feel her cheeks turning bright red. Daisy looked at her weird, never having heard such a noise leave her friend's bottom. Although it was a natural thing humans did, she didn't think Peach was capable. She was so lady-like it seemed impossible for her to be able to do such a thing!

"Excuse...oh no..." she held her stomach as it started rumbling even louder than before. The next thing she knew was she was on her back and let out a long strong fart. It was so strong that Daisy and Todette had to cling onto whatever heavy object they could. Even their grip didn't last long as the smell and wind was too strong.

Toadatte flew out the window while Daisy was pinned to the wall suffering from Peach's farts. She passed out before too long. Once she woke up, she was inside of the hospital with a bandaged up Toadette in a bed beside her. As she sat up, she shook her head. Man, Peach had some strong...she sniffed the air. Oh geez! The smell was still on her! She needed a bath. Then a nurse came in.

"Princess Daisy! Are you alright?" asked the nurse.

"Of course not!" said the princess. "I smell like ass and I just got sprayed down with my best friend's farts and I probably would have gotten killed if I hadn't gotten lucky!"

"Please don't use such strong language, Princess Daisy." said the nurse wincing.

"Sorry." apologized Daisy rolling her eyes. "So where is she? She's going to pay for this!"

"Who?"

"Peach!"

"What did she do?" asked the nurse.

"She nearly farted me to death." Daisy thought about what she said for a minute. "Or is it, she nearly farted to death? I was nearly killed by her farts? Yeah that last one is right. Anyways, where the hell is she?!"

"Princess!"

"Sorry."

"Princess, I think you may have confused yourself. Princess Peach would never have such a problem. She's completely incapable of making such inappropriate things come out of her tush! It was Bowser!"

"And you say that why?" asked the young woman crossing her arms.

The nurse then told her what Peach had told her. As it turns out, the princess had blamed Toadette's injuries on Bowser breaking in and blowing up the place. He hadn't gotten the chance to kidnap her since one of the pillars in her castle had fallen and broken the flying machine he had been on. The stench around the castle came from whatever Bowser had in store for the kingdom. Daisy scoffed at the story. She was too embarrassed about her farts being that strong. Embarrassed or not, the princess needed to get her behind checked out.

"Where is Peach?"

"She's off with Mario." said the nurse going over to Toadette's bed and checking the monitor.

"Okay. See ya!" she ran off.

"Wait!" the nurse raised a hand. "We still need to..."

But Daisy was already gone. She headed over to Mario and Luigi's place, hoping to catch the two before Peach blew him away too.


	2. Smells Galore

"Oh, Mario, right there!" cried out Peach. Her boyfriend and her were having passionate sex in his bedroom. Luigi was out of the house for the evening, leaving them the two alone for an hour or so of sexy time. Peach was close to the edge when she farted. Mario stopped all movement.

"Peach?"

"It was just the bed." she said quickly.

"If you say so." her boyfriend said although he could see right through her lie. He wasn't going to question it though. He would have continued, if it wasn't for the smell. It smelled like rotten eggs that had been going bad for 3 weeks. He tried pulling away, but Peach only held him tighter and gave him those big puppy eyes of hers.

'Deal with the smell. Deal with it.' he sighed in his head. 'It'll air out soon...I hope.'

Unfortunately for the plumber, it didn't. As a matter of fact, that wasn't the last burst of hot, smelly air that came out of her behind. Mario wanted to tell Peach he wasn't feeling it today, but she kept him close. It was like she wanted him to die from her stink. That or she took pleasure in smelling her own ass stench mixed with sex. He wasn't sure which was worse.

He was glad when it was over. Any longer and he'd pass out. Peach kissed her boyfriend's cheek and told him she was going to bake a cake. Once she left out of the bedroom, he immedietly opened up the window. Air! Sweet delicious air! He grabbed his sheets and replaced them as they were covered with the horrible stench of Peach's farts. He kicked them inside of his closet and made a mental note to burn them once Peach wasn't around.

When he went downstairs, Peach was on the floor gripping her stomach with a spilled bowl of mixture on the floor near her. She was groaning in pain. "Mario!"

"Peach!" he came to her side. "Are you okay?"

"My stomach! It hurts!"

"I'll go call for the..."

"STEP AWAY FROM HER!" said Daisy bursting into the room kitchen. "SHE'S A HAZARD!"

"A hazard?"

"She blew up her house with her farts and nearly killed me and Toadette!" said Daisy glaring at the princess. "She needs to get her butt looked at!"

As much as he agreed with her, he had to defend the honor of his girlfriend. However Daisy was ready for the plumber's protests. She pointed behind the man. "Oh crap! Bowser!"

"WHERE?!" Mario turned around. Daisy hit Mario on the head with a frying pan.

"MARIO!" said Peach looked over at her unconscious boyfriend. "Daisy, why did you do that?"

"Because he was going to stop me from doing this!" Daisy grabbed her and dragged her out of the room to her car.

Peach asked where they were going, but she didn't answer. She was worried about Mario, but at the same time she was wondering what her friend was going to do. She hadn't meant to injure her friends. If she could hold it in, she would have. She took her to the hospital much to Peach's horror. She couldn't let anyone else know she had a farting problem. Besides, there was the fact that she feared she'd blow up the hospital like she did with her castle.

"Daisy, we shouldn't be here!" said Peach.

"Oh yes we should!" said Daisy as she parked her car. "Your gassy ass nearly killed us and I don't want you putting Luigi and Mario in danger just because nobody believes you have a destructive butt."

"I don't have a destructive..." Peach farted loudly. "...bottom!"

"You destroyed your own castle." said Daisy. "If that's not destructive, I don't know what is. You need to get your problem checked out!"

"No!" said Peach angrily. "I don't need someone poking around there! I don't even let Mario poke around there..."

"TMI, sister." said Daisy.

"...so what makes you think I'm going to let a doctor?" finished the blonde woman. "I'm not going!"

"Oh yes you are!" said the red head. "You're a danger to everyone in the mushroom kingdom with your atomic farts!"

"I am not!"

"YOU BLASTED TOADETTE OUT A WINDOW WITH YOUR BUTT ALONE!" she yelled. Several toads looked their way. Peach looked embarrassed. "GET THAT HOLE CHECKED OUT BEFORE IT ACTUALLY KILLS SOMEONE!"

"I did not! That was Bowser!"

"Bullshit!"

"Watch your mouth, Miss Potty Mouth!" reprimanded Peach. It was hard to tell whether she was referring to her saying bullshit or the part about her behind or both. Either way, the toads nearby were pretending not to hear them. "I will not have you going around and giving me a bad name!"

"You've already give yourself a bad name with those farts!"

Without a word, she got out of her car, slammed the door, and stormed off. Daisy was right behind her. Okay so maybe those weren't the best words to use for this situation. One couldn't be blunt with Peach. You had to be more delicate, even if you were her best friend. She tried apologizing, but she would hear none of it. Peach had just left the parking lot when she felt her stomach rumbling again. She looked around and saw a nearby park. She ran over to it and went inside of the bathroom, but found it occupied in all stalls. Fudge! There was only one place to go, so she snuck into the men's bathroom. Once inside she tried her best to get it all out, but to no avail.

"Come on!" she didn't want to strain herself, but it just wouldn't come out. All that came out was farts. "Dang it!"

"Princess Peach? Is that you?" asked Toad.

Peach slapped her hands over her mouth and wished she could hold it in, but her farts just kept coming and loudly too. She decided to disguise her voice. "N-no! This is...um...Alfred! Yeah, Alfred!"

"Oh! You sounded like the princess for a minute." said Toad. "You okay in there? You sound like you ate a bad burrito."

"I-I'm fine." said Peach glad Toad didn't know it was her. "Thanks for asking anyways."

"You're..." Suddenly Peach's stomach growled even louder and then she was rocketed full speed out of the bathroom destroying it and the park in the process. She rocketed all the way to the lake outside of Daisy's castle. Luckily she landed in the water, although ruining her dress in the process. Could it get any worse from here? When another fart from her caused the lake's fish to float to the top, yes. Yes it could.


End file.
